I finally gave this one a go.
I’m ashamed to say it has been years and years since I’ve seen any of the Hellraiser films. I should really give the entire omnibus a good re-watch. I held out on watching this new take because of a perceived affinity I had for the originals, though, as I think about it now, aside from the initial 1987 Hellraiser, I remember very little about the other movies.
As a general rule, I’m not a fan of remakes or re-imaginings or whatever you want to call it when classic films are redone for a modern audience. There are plenty other great stories out there; no need to recycle old ideas. If you want to make a fucked up flick, make Grandpappy into a movie instead of making yet another Friday the 13th or A Nightmare on Elm Street. However, despite my distaste for remakes, I enjoyed 2022’s Hellraiser quite a lot.
The plot is pretty simple. A woman struggling with a addiction, along with her boyfriend, break into a warehouse and steal the puzzle box we’re all familiar with from the previous films. They don’t have a clue what it is but it doesn’t take long for the box to start doing its thing and for the Cenobites to start showing up.
The narrative plays out very much like a mystery story. In fact, the formula is similar to that used in films like Smile, The Ring, and Sinister. An evil smile or an evil film or an evil house—in this case, an evil box—is wreaking havoc, and our protagonist is trying desperately to find out what’s going on, while most everyone around them thinks they’re crazy. The problem with using this type of formulaic narrative with Hellraiser is that everyone in the audience already knows what the puzzle box is capable of. Sure, there are probably a handful of viewers not familiar with the original films, but not many. Thus, we’re watching a bunch of characters try to figure out the box and Cenobites, when we all know what’s going on. This fact sucks the suspense out of the movie.
As expected, the gore and special effects are excellent. The Cenobites are all cool. While Doug Bradley’s Pinhead will never be topped, the female version (who they’re now referring to as The Priest for some fucking reason), played by Jamie Clayton, was fine. She was creepy, though I think the robotic masculine voice they used for her, which is the same voice used in a billion other movies about demons, could have been better. The creation of a new Cenobite at the end was probably my favorite part of the film. It made me cringe.
Hellraiser is bloody and fun, yet I feel like a came away somewhat unsatisfied. Perhaps that’s because of the lack of suspense. Or maybe because it doesn’t offer much of anything new. Aside from the making of the Cenobite, there was nothing particularly shocking or fresh. It is a good remake but it is simply that—a remake.
PC3’s Horror and Exploitation Movie Scale of Awesomeness!
Gore - 9
Special Effects - 8
Nudity/Sexuality - 6
Wow Factor - 4
Acting - 4
Fear Factor - 5
Story/Plot/Originality - 3
Cinematography/Atmosphere - 7
Sound/Music - 6
Fun Factor - 6
Hellraiser earns a very respectable 58 on the PHEMSA. It’s a good movie, especially for new audiences, folks who perhaps aren’t familiar with the original series. But it could have been better. It’s lacks originality, as all remakes do. You can find it on Hulu.