Lol, Jesus Christ.
The title basically writes the movie, doesn’t it? I mean, when you hear Cocaine Bear you know exactly what the fuck you’re in for. If you assume you’re in for a campy, absurd horror comedy, you would be abso-fuckin-lutely correct.
It’s ridiculous, so let’s get that out of the way. It’s impossible to suspend disbelief. The writing is humor and kill driven rather than plot driven. The acting, gore, and CGI effects are all over-the-top. Yet, Cocaine Bear is also awesome.
The basic plot is this: A cocaine shipment is mis-dropped from a plane over a remote part of the United States. Thus, cops and gangbangers converge in the woods to find the loot. Kids, hikers, and mountain rangers also find themselves mixed up in the cocaine drama. But before anyone else get their hands on the shipment of drugs, a black bear finds it . . . and loves it!
The ensuing events are nothing short of comedic violence gold, with the high-as-a-kite bear ripping people to shreds in the craziest ways.
There are no surprises here. As I said, you know what silliness you’re in for at the outset. The writing is not very strong, but it does what it needs to do, which is provide a bare-bones storyline for all the insanity to take place. At times, the CGI is super obvious, especially in scenes where the bear is doing things a bear would never in reality do. Very often, bad CGI will ruin a movie for me; I’m not a fan of CGI anyway, so when it’s poorly executed, it’s even worse. But with a goofy movie like this, it’s not as harmful to the overall experience. And they did mix in some decent practical effects.
With this film, check your brain at the door and just have fun.
PC3’s Horror and Exploitation Movie Scale of Awesomeness!
Gore - 7
Special Effects - 7
Nudity/Sexuality - 0
Wow Factor - 7
Acting - 4
Fear Factor - 2
Story/Plot/Originality - 5
Cinematography/Atmosphere - 9 (cinematography was actually really damn good)
Sound/Music - 6
Fun Factor - 9
Nice! Cocaine Bear gets a 56 overall PHEMSA, which is really good for a campy flick. It’s free on Prime right now.
If you like wild horror comedies, check out my Splatterpunk Award-nominated novella Grandpappy.